Why You Should Take up Golf Instead of Cycling
Article by Sports Writer Derek Clements
CYCLING has become one of the most popular pastimes in the United Kingdom, in part as a result of the success of the likes of Bradley Wiggins and Chris Froome in the Tour de France. They are achievements to be celebrated and there is no doubt that cycling does improve your fitness. But not everybody loves cyclists - many of their fellow road users abuse them. And life on the road on a bike can be extremely dangerous. We think that you should be taking up golf instead and here we list just a few very good (and somewhat tongue in cheek) reasons why.
On the golf course you will never never experience road rage. OK, we admit that you may lose your own temper when you hit a poor shot and you might experience some frustration if the group in front are holding you up but fisticuffs? Abuse? We don’t think so!
If there is any potential danger an a golf course, somebody will always shout ‘Fore’, giving you the opportunity to duck. On a bike, you just need to hope that other drivers will make allowances for you or that they have seen you.
When did you last see traffic lights on a golf course? Or a traffic jam? Or a pot hole?
On the golf course, other golfers will not regard you as some kind of terrorist who shouldn’t be there. On a bike, there is every possibility that you are going to be verbally abused for what you think is no good reason.
On a golf course you can answer a mobile phone without fear of being arrested. Yes, yes, yes, we know that answering a mobile phone while playing golf is generally frowned upon but there are times when you just have to take that call. Answer your mobile while riding a bike and you are going to be in big trouble.
Cyclists fall off their bikes. When was the last time you saw a golfer on his back (apart from your mate who has taken seven shots to escape from a bunker, of course)?
Cycle lanes? Pah! Who needs them when you get out there on the golf course and you do not have to worry about whether your ball goes left, right or straight down the middle without concerning yourself about whether you are going to be run over?
On a golf course, nobody will ever honk a horn at you.
You will NEVER suffer a puncture in the middle of nowhere and wonder how on earth you are going to get home.
On a golf course, who cares if you walk down the fairway four abreast? Now think about how you felt the last time you drove down a country lane, came round a bend and found your route ahead blocked by a group of four cyclists
You will never have to wear lycra or a crash helmet. OK, so we admit that golf fashion is not always the best, but it definitely beats ill-fitting lycra.
On a golf course, if it pours with rain you have the option of heading for the sanctuary of the clubhouse and if you choose to carry on then you won’t have to worry about what might happen if you need to stop quickly. Try applying the brakes in a hurry on a bike on a wet road!
You can put your golf clubs in the boot of your car. Have you ever tried putting a racing bike in your boot?
If you play golf you don’t need to fit one of those awful cycle racks to the back of your car.
You can have a drink while you play golf - and afterwards too. Doing the same before, during or after riding a bike is likely to be frowned upon.
You can have a laugh and enjoy the company of your friends while playing golf. Try talking to a fellow cyclist while riding through a city centre.
On a golf course you will never, ever find a Boris Bike! Or a congestion charge area!
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