What Makes a Perfect Day on The Golf Course

By: Derek Clements | Wed 08 Feb 2023

Just a perfect day

Problems all left alone

Weekenders on our own

It's such fun

Just a perfect day

You made me forget myself

I thought I was someone else

Someone good

Oh, it's such a perfect day

I'm glad I spent it with you

Oh, such a perfect day

You just keep me hanging on

WHEN Lou Reed wrote Perfect Day it is fairly safe to assume that he did not have a round of golf in mind. But for everybody who plays the game, Perfect Day is precisely what 18 holes is all about.

So what is my idea of the perfect round of golf?

The Weather

When I open the curtains in the morning I want to see blue sky. My favourite time of year is spring, when everything is coming back to life and the temperature is hitting around 17C.

Car Park

It is all about first impressions and if I am playing at a club for the first time I want to drive in and find a well-presented, pristine car park, with spaces clearly marked.

Pro Shop

This is your first stop and there are two key things I want to find - somebody behind the counter who greets me with a smile and makes me feel welcome and a shop that is well-organised and well stocked, with prices that don’t break the bank. I really don’t want to feel that I am being ripped off.

Changing Rooms

Having paid my green fee I want to head to changing rooms that are clean, fresh and welcoming. There is hand sanitiser and effective hand dryers. And for members there are lockers.

Perfect Day Playing Golf

Playing Partners

The perfect round of golf is played with like-minded friends whose company you enjoy. They are of a similar ability to you and over the course of 18 holes you all enjoy plenty of laughs.

First Tee

Yeah! There is nobody on the first tee so you can get your round under way without delay and the starter gives you the thumbs up and tells you that he hopes you enjoy your round.

Pace of Play

Having looked forward to playing a new course my perfect round involves no waiting. The dream round is when you and your three playing partners can just crack on with it without hanging around on every hole, on every shot.

The Smell of Newly Cut Grass

Is there a better smell? I don’t think so. I just love walking down a fairway that has just been manicured to perfection by the greenkeepers.

Greens

Oh for greens that are as smooth and true-running as a snooker table, with no unprepared pitchmarks. I don’t want them to be as fast as Augusta National - but I do want to know that if I find the right line then the ball has a chance of finding the hole and will not bounce all over the place if I hit the putt properly.

Bunkers

At some point I know that I am going to end up in a bunker. In my perfect round I want to find my ball lying in fluffy white sand that has been beautifully raked, with no ugly footprints.

Halfway House

You come off the ninth green, the sun is shining. My perfect round sees a stop at the halfway house for a cold drink and a bacon sandwich. Failing a halfway house, there is somebody on a buggy selling quality food and drink.

Your Form

It almost goes without saying that in my perfect round of golf I have found my very best form, hitting fairways from the tee, finding my trademark draw, hitting greens in regulation and putting like Matthew Fitzpatrick (OK, so that bit is in my dreams!).

18th Green

My perfect round sees me facing a 15-foot putt on the final green to win the match for myself and my partner and seeing the ball drop into the cup.

The 19th Hole

So, you have competed the perfect round of golf and you head to the clubhouse. The first thing I want to experience is atmosphere, people laughing. Then comes the perfect pint at a reasonable price and sandwiches that don’t taste like cardboard or a meal that doesn’t taste like it was cooked three days ago. In the corner is a TV showing golf on Sky Sports.