Stuart Govan (The Bird??)


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Stuart Govan (The Bird??)

Wayne Santorini


Handicap : 0

Posted : Tue 10th Aug 2010 17:41
Anyone know what happened re the above and prepared to spill the beans
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Dave ley


Handicap : 9.7

Reply : Tue 10th Aug 2010 17:58
He won't be around for ages he tee'd off at 8:30 lets just make something up!
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Wayne Santorini


Handicap : 0

Reply : Tue 10th Aug 2010 18:03
I reckon that just prior to Govan teeing off, a bird having made it's nest then settled down and laid 2 eggs, the chicks hatched and built up enough strength from the daily feeding they got from the parents, then they flew the nest as young adults and at that point Govan had finished his pre-shot routine and settled down to hit the ball !!!!!!!!!
Last edit : Tue 10th Aug 2010 18:03
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John Sweeney


Handicap : 11.4

Reply : Tue 10th Aug 2010 19:01
Not only did he hit one of the Geese on the pond (so I have been informed). The bird was stunned but the ball finished on the fairway, just off the green. In spite of all that luck and time, he still managed to finish the round with the Princely amount of 21 pts. Well done Stuart. Was playing in the group behind but did not get held up because he just picked his ball up for most of the holes.
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Russell Middleton

[FORUM MODERATOR]
Handicap : 14.7

Reply : Wed 11th Aug 2010 05:42

As an 'Eye Witness' to this event I can only say the following....

It was a short par five (7th hole on the Abbotts Course) and after taking 8 shots we arrived to find his ball about twenty yards away from a tree.  This tree has some low branches and Stuart was left with only two choices.  Either a big hook out over the pond and then bringing the ball back onto dry land, or a punch shot keeping the ball underneath the branches.

Having looked at the skill factor involved in both shots Stuart knew the first option had no chance of happening, so he was left with only one choice, the low punch shot.

I watched as his silky smooth swing made a perfect connection with the ball.  The ball shot off just above the grass.  Reminded me of clip from a cruise missile promotion film!

There was a small flock of Canadian Geese in front of the tree and by the side of the pond.

Stuart's missile impacted the said Goose midbody.  The goose lept into action, shot off into the pond and made a hasty retreat from the spot where it had been assaulted!

The rest of our group, myself included were speechless!  Never in all my time playing golf have I witnessed such an act of violence against a defenceless creature.  It was appalling!

Once Stuart had stopped whooping and hollering, and the dance was something that had to be seen.  It took about ten minutes for the euphoria to die down and for Stuart to return to being a normal human being, for which up until this point he had been!

Now that our speech had returned I mentioned to Stuart that I needed to get my mobile phone from my bag so I could phone the RSPCA.

After calming down I told Stuart he could either play another ball from where he had played the original one, but I would be moving the Canadian Geese out of the way first, or he could take a drop from the lateral water hazard.

With that wicked smile on his face, the one you see on a young child who had just completed his first shoplifting mission he walked towards the pond.

As we walked the long fifteen yards to the pond I was amazed to see a golf ball sitting on the grass about a foot away from the edge of the pond.  Stuart walked upto the ball and proudly announced 'That's mine'.

Having played his shot he then announced to the group that this was in fact the second time he had played this trick shot!!!

When I was standing behind Stuart's ball before the assault on the goose I thought to myself that it would require a very good shot to keep the ball low and get it the 120 or so yards to the green.  Never did I think of playing a shot off a goose and taking the water/tree completely out of the shot!!!  My course management is so poor no wonder I cannot get my handicap down!

Russ

 

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Wayne Santorini


Handicap : 0

Reply : Wed 11th Aug 2010 08:22

Good old Stu

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David Marshall


Handicap : 9.9

Reply : Wed 11th Aug 2010 11:27

I wonder what anecdotes will apply once Govan has experienced Saunton?

http://www.sauntongolf.co.uk/ 

Last edit : Wed 11th Aug 2010 11:28
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Stuart Govan


Handicap : 11.5

Reply : Wed 11th Aug 2010 17:30

You mean when Saunton has experienced Govan?

The Goose

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David Marshall


Handicap : 9.9

Reply : Wed 11th Aug 2010 19:43

So you are saying your nickname is..'The Goose'

 

Interesting choice, Govan...

 

Here follows the dictionary definition of 'Goose'

goose (go̵̅o̅s)

noun pl. geese

  1. any of various long-necked, web-footed, wild or domestic waterfowl that are like ducks but larger; esp., a female as distinguished from a gander
  2. the flesh of a goose, used for food
  3. a silly person
  4. a tailor's pressing iron with a long handle curved somewhat like the neck of a goose
  5. Slang a sudden, playful prod in the backside
  6. N.B.  definiton #3 should read..Idiot
  7. Ref # 5  you touch my #### and it will be the last thing you do, as you will get #4 right in the kisser

 

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