Forum > Chat and Banter

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Just had a flick through the teams and worked out the H/C average across each side. I know not a very scientific way to look at things....but I had a spare minute.

It looks alot closer than one might think (going by the South's bravado)

Unless I got something wrong it is as follows

North Team = 14.752

South Team = 15.495

So very even.

I'm looking forward to this already. Who is going down for the Sunday warm-up? - I'll be there and staying over at the hotel on the Sunday night

Wayne Santorini

If last year was anything to go by Leweis there should be about 30 odd staying over, then again Wokefield was further away from the midlands area so it's possibly many of those lads will just travel each day.

Never the less I'll be there

Be prepared for some stick mate the banter gets pretty rough on the Sunday night

David Marshall

Flipping heck Lewis...I worked out the very same thing a few weeks ago. And came to the same conclusion, that it is close according to the average handicaps.

HOWEVER 

There is one VERY important factor that you have to include in this summation. But you have not included that 

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

What may that be then David?

Is it that we have Santo playing off scratch.

Tim Hawkins

David Marshall

Well.  That bit, Lewis, is irrelevant to the outcome. 

There are actually more influencing contributing factors. But I'm not sure I should say.

But I will if you want me to  

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

I feel like your trying to reel me in Mr Marshall.....not sure if I'll bite this time.

Tim - that would be a good stat to see. I'm hoping to go from 30 in Sept to around 20 by the time the N'v'S comes around. Obviously easier to drop your h/c when you are rubbish to being with !!!

David Marshall

Let me know when you ARE ready then, Lewis.

And I'll start adding to the list for you 

Tim Hawkins

Chris Brannon

David Marshall

Tim..You daft coot...Lewis is the one who wants to bite, not me...I'll just fire the bullets

Andy Kenyon

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

David Marshall

Chris Brannon

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Wayne Santorini

you tell him Chris

David Marshall

You can indeed have the Tuesday off, Chris, and maybe a few more too.

It won't be the celebrating that will keep you off. It'll be the something else entirely 

Wayne Santorini

David Marshall

That is one thing that will not happen, Waynetta.

Burning out and seeing my handicap rise, indeed ..

You Cheeky pair of  @@@@@@@ 

Wayne Santorini

Matchplay is a different scenario Lewis, it will be close!! as you will note from the tension in the clubhouse as the results come in.

Especially as both the 9th & 18th greens are under the balcony so there will be 2 sets of results coming in at one time

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Paul Williams

I'll be playing both days, But not sure on the stop over as Mel's due on the 12th April. If the baby comes early(most likely-I hope) then we may stop over.

Either way will be around for some of the Sunday "chit-chat" .

When are the pairs going to be looked at by the way?

Graham Brown

I'll be travelling down on the Sunday, but won't get there in time for the Sunday comp.

I'm bringing the missus and the newborn (he's only 9 days old), but need to get him into the swing (pardon the pun) of things early on.

 Just out of interest is anyone else bringing their partners?

Stuart Govan

David Marshall

Stuart Govan

Indeed. The exact reverse of our partnership in the Algarve last year, first day, where you contributed SFA

Andy Kenyon

By way of example of how close it can be it is worth reminding us of the scores in last years N vs S.

Dave ley

David Marshall

Stuart...Not only do you live in a world of your own..You seem to get things @@@@ about backwards.

I assume you are referring to the match, at Silves, with Michael and Paul and you and I, when I scored 38 points and we won the matchplay. Looking at the notes I kept, you scored 26 points and didn't win a single hole. 

09-Feb-2009

Pestana Golf Resort - Silves Golf

Faro

Yellow

70

5748

67 [119.000]

78

38

David Marshall

Andy..Thanks for posting the scores. It's good to see them again.

 I had totally forgotten about the score in the first match

Stuart Govan

So not only was your game all over the place, you even got out cards mixed up?

That would explain why I came last last year, if your scores were attributed to me...

David Marshall

Stuart Govan

Tempting as it is to blame it on that, it's more that I could neither chip nor putt.

Bit like you really.

David Marshall

Paul Williams

I remember it well Stuart, The game we should have won. We we're 2 up at the turn and you were missing putts so badly we couldn't offer you gimmes on 18' as it was so hit and miss.

Given the fact I was still half cut following the late night shenanigans with Mr Ley the night before and was my 1st N V S, I thought you were bloody lucky to come away with the win What done it for you was fatigue from both Kevin and Myself because of the blinking 6 hour round

I personally will be asking Martin for the opportunity to put the record straight!

Very enjoyable match though, But I will be taking it much more seriously this year as last year I didn't really grasp the importance or competitive nature between the two side.

Training camp starts on 31st Jan.

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Paul,

This will be my first N'v'S .....it will in fact be my first comp period. I'm staying over on the Sunday but I'll be sure not to get too merry that night. I feel a little bit sorry for whom ever I get paired with, even with my lack of skill though - I'll still be very competitive.

Paul Williams

Don't get me wrong, I thought It would be competitive just didn't realise how much. It was my first real comp, But the nature of this event really gets everyone fired up, People do actually change for those 18 holes,  I do recall a couple of heated moments last year.

I got caught up in the banter and TBH nerves did play apart, But its a great experience and I'm really looking forward to this year and setting the record straight, Hopefully I'll be able to dedicate my victory to my new born soon due on the 10th April

With regards your skill Lewis, Its the higher handicappers that due the damage points wise, So make the most of your shot allowance and you'll be fine. I see your handicap is falling quite rapidly now, Well done

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Congrats on your soon(ish) to be born.....we are expecting our first any day now.

I think I can get my H/C down to 20 by the time this comp comes around.......no doubt I'll hit a skills wall some point soon.

John Pettitt

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

John, it would be a pleasure !.....I better read the rules of the game first.....as no doubt you will pick me up on all my newbie mistakes.

Being serious though......the rules of the game are one of the things I haven't really looked at at all.......I better get reading

David Marshall

Paul Williams, stated..

'I personally will be asking Martin for the opportunity to put the record straight!'

I seem to remember a certain pairing asking for exactly the same thing. Look how that turned out.

So that makes it another win for whoever you play against  

John Pettitt

David Marshall

John Pettitt

David Marshall

Really?   Tell me more...

What I did was to look at our South team pairings, based on who wanted to play with who. Then assess the best order in which to send them out.

Tim did the same. They were then submitted to Darren, at the same time. The rest is history  

Tim Hawkins

I hope that's how it happens again this year John.  The only pairings that were fixed were the captains who went out first, and apart from some people requesting early or mid-draw positions, were all completely random.  We both drew up our lists, sent them to Darren and that's how it came out.

It's a shame in a way, because I would love to have a re-match with David and his grandson, but random is the only way. 

Stuart Govan

David Marshall

Stuart Govan

David Marshall

Tim...We can have a mini rematch in the Algarve

 I'll make sure Miss Govan is nowhere to be found 

Paul Williams

I dont mind, Just expressing my desire to put the record straight, And I'll let my Captain knows this then the rest is in the lap of the gods. No funny business going on here I tell you Gov!

How was it arranged then For JP and Darren to play Perryranger and Floody, as I recall that pairing was spoken about well before the event

Govan invincible????? ROLF,LMFAO

David Marshall

don't know about invincible.

Just wish he was invisible  

Dave ley

Only Captain Scarlet is " invincible " didn't you watch the series you Mysterons got zapped every week.

Lewis it will be nice to meet you at the event ,we can have a chat sunday night I will give you some sound advice on matchplay .

Dave ley

Only Captain Scarlet is " invincible " didn't you watch the series you Mysterons got zapped every week.

Lewis it will be nice to meet you at the event ,we can have a chat sunday night I will give you some sound advice on matchplay .

David Homer

Note to North Captain - I'll be happy to go out in one of the first groups to put a point on the board for the mighty North. - David "The Conquerer" Homer!!! Fresh from a 2 & 1 victory yesterday!!!!

Danny Brant

David Homer

Paul Williams

And you have the Nerve call me a bandit Boom boom????

A note to the south team, Dave Homer is the North's Bubba Watson!!

Dave ley

David Homer

Lol! Its true, my four pars on the spin on Saturday should have all been birdies.

The only blubbing will be done over a large shandy with a dash. 

David Homer

PW - You can be a bandit all day when you're on the same side!!!!!

Darren Ramowski

Anyone reading this who wants to play then the South team have 1 current spot ?

David Marshall

Oh this takes me back to 2007, when a certain Messers Waynetta Santorini was threatening to do all sorts of damage with whoever he got paired with.

Do you remember it Danny? 

John Flood

Darren,

Have you taken note of everyone's handicap who is attending the NvS & going to stop any manual adjustment or maybe even a max increase before the event?

John Pettitt

John Flood

John,

I'd never question your handicap. I know you are a winner & you would never feel happy by winning off anything but a true reflection of your abilities.

For people who are a member of a golf club then their handicaps WILL have to apply whether that's higher or lower than their GS one.

It was more aimed at people who fall outside of this category.

Danny Brant

Wayne Santorini

Lewis, I will tell you this now so please make a note;

Do not under any circumstances get involved with Mr Ley on the night before the comp due to the following;

1) You will not be in bed before 3am!!!

2) You will not even know what time it is due to the alcohol intake that you will have endured with said Mr Ley!!!

3) If you think you can play mind games, forget it Leyo is the south's answer to 'Paul McKenna', speak to Chris P or Paul W for confirmation!!!!

John Pettitt

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Thanks for the heads up Wayne........being the 'new boy' and all - It takes a while to work out people.....it's even harder to see when a forum is the only form of communication. Once I meet people I usually work out quickly what peoples games are

The fact that the south captain wanted to 'help' me with the rules said quite alot anyway!

David Marshall

I'm happy to help you too, Lewis....

And the offer for you to bite is still there  xxxxxx 

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

my no thanks....was a jokey 'no thanks'

not the - your no good David no thanks ! It reads like

Paul Williams

Santo, And to think I was considering rooming with Leyo  Flashbacks to the story of the two captains, One night in a hotel, Driver and a slapped arse!

Care to tell Lewis the tale........

David Marshall

It's OK, Lewis...

My offer to help was a 'jokey' offer too

But feel free to bite

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

you would like that wouldn't you??? Not going to happen

But I would like to hear the story Paul

David Marshall

Lewis..That tale is a need to know basis.

You don't need OR WANT to know..Trust me

Unless of course, that kind of thing rocks your boat? 

John Pettitt

Basically, Lewis, the hard northerners thought that they could drink a southern softie under the table, but unfortunately it did not quite work out the way they thought, as the southern softie, our own captain of the south team this year, Mr David Ley has the capacity to sink vast amounts of draught guiness without it having an affect on him.

They will have learned from this, one would hope, but I feel quite sure they will be suckered again this year.

Dave ley

"Look into my eyes Lewis, Not around them into them" Haven't the foggiest what there all talkin aboot!

Bad news today guys my hcp as been adjusted by my Home club on reflection of last seasons performances in Medal/Stapleford competions from 8.1 to 9.1, I cannot believe this has happened especially with the forthcoming NvS even with my protestation the hcp comittee would not be swayed especially after recieving my comp results from my 2nd club.Ironically though not swayed to leave my hcp as is,none would take up my offer of playing for money!!!

David Marshall

Dave ley

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

John Pettitt

Lewis Gladstone-buchanan

I wouldn't do that John, that would be wrong......I've inputted all my rounds on here - so I'll go by that

John Pettitt

Well done. Lewis, a man of honour, a crooked victory is no victory at all. We all like to win but not at any price.

I have lost far more than I have ever won. Of course I have been fortunate to win both my previous N v S encounters. A good partner always helps.

Darren Millichip

Lewis.... the story goes

it was me and paul williams enjoying a few cheeky sherbets with mr ley until the wee hours on the monday morning. 

after deciding that mr leys mind tricks wouldnt work and his best efforts to get me feeling rough the next day we decided to go to bed, mr leys room wasnt far away from my room with whom i was sharing with my bro the present north team captain, mr ley decided he was going to have a look at his left handed swing with my bro's right handed driver but seem to get a little confused at which ball to hit and proceeded to slap martin on his rather exposed backside causing some profanities from him and lots of hilarious laughing from me and mr ley (martin did see the funny side in the morning though)

also mr leys efforts were in vain as if i remember rightly i was up bright and early fresh as a daisy for breakfast with mr ley looking more worse for wear.

as for the mind games on the golf they only affected me on the first hole where i promply lost my ball in the rough no more than 60 ft from the tee D'OH, to which my next ball went straight up the fairway to the delight of mr ley with the comment " i have always been told your the best 3 off the tee bloke in golfshake"

and if it wasnt for the most basic of basic schoolboy errors on the 4th hole namely the leaves in the bunker incident we would have won that!!! but hey the records show a 1 hole win to the south and that is that no matter how many if's and but's

all round though a very enjoyable event and you will certainly enjoy it as well

Paul Williams

In other words, Leyo is to be avoided at all costs! Wind up merchant of the highest order.

The B'tard had me a treat back in August. I had organised the West Midlands regional qualifier. Leyo's group are the first back in. We were supposed to have steak baps after the round. David got his group, Note not himself and a very Believable Rosa to inform me that the staff had informed our party that the club had run out of steak and being a Sunday had offered to upgrade us to a Lamb dinner, All I had to do was walk into the clubhouse and ask for Melissa.

Imagine the tw../ twerp I looked trying to explain my situation to the bar staff

Walk back onto the patio knowing I've been done good and proper.  B*$&@rds!

David Marshall

David is a hoot...No doubt about it

Under his leadership, the South team is gonna cruise this years event. Nobody would dare do anything other than their finest, in fear of retribution.  

Martin Millichip

Now then, I have been quietly watching the posts over the last few weeks and it is now time for the North Captain to speak.

I as captain of the North team for theis years N v S event take great pride in the fact that I will lead a group of golfers who will perform how I know they can. The South's bravado is to be commended however misplaced it may be. 

As regards Mr Ley, my opposing Captain, I wish you luck and hope your team perform for you as you will then have no excuses for the defeat you will undoubtedly suffer. As regards the mind games, they only affect those who are not used to matchplay golf, and he will testify to that I was immune to his guile last year (Unlike my playing partner who has been suitably reprimanded and told I will not tolerate any more of those silly schoolboy mistakes).

The games will be played in the spirit to which they should and the best team will be victorious.

Right, enough of the CRAP - THE SOUTH TEAM WILL GET WALLOPED.

Darren Ramowski

South team are filling those final few spots.  Just had to decent players to the South list with 2 great golfers ready to join.

This will be an epic match I am sure! especially with the banter starting so early!

Wayne Santorini

The North still lead 2-1 and that will be changed to 3-1 in April

WITHOUT DOUBT.

John Pettitt

2 - 1 you say eh!!!  Santo, you conveniently forgot the the northerners you loaned to us and then beat, not a victory at all in my opinion. Evemn then it was only one game in it, yet last year the difference between the two sides was vast and will continue in the same vein in future.

John Flood

We had to loan you players John because the Southeners were too scared to join in

Darren,

it would be a good idea to maybe have a sheet with a list of 'basic' matchplay rules for old & new players as a reference when out on the course.

John.

John Pettitt

John, I doubt that was the reason, more likely to be that we only have a third of the country to choose from and Belton Woods was a long way north for us southern softies.

I also believe that only the matches between northerners and southerners should have counted as we certainly lost out  to having your loaned players to make an equal number .

David Marshall

Oh Heck

I see the voice (or should I say voices) of the Mysterons has started.

Idle threats Mr North Captain, don't phase the superior Southerners one tiny bit 

Wayne Santorini

John I am amazed at your comment;

 ** lost out  to having your loaned players to make an equal number **

I'm sure I can speak for everyone that in no way was any game "given" or "lost" on account of loaned players, and feel sure that those players that played for the South from the north area would be upset to even be thought of not giving their all no matter who they played for.

Very serious comments indeed sir and I trust that when our resulting win on the day is announced you will retract them with the honour of a gentleman that I know you are!!!!!!

Wayne Santorini

*phase*

I'm sure you meant Faze?????

Darren Millichip

John Pettitt

I have not said that those northerners playing for the south did not try, I just feel that those that were loaned to us were not your best players. Nothing wrong in that as I am quite sure we would do the same if the boot was on the other foot.

Suffice to say that if either side is short then in my opinion they cannot be a part of the match.

Wayne Santorini

The players loaned to you were on the waiting list and therefore not quick enough to get into the first 32 that's all, we would never give away a player already selected to be replaced by a better one if the better one was last on the list, you would get him by right of registration.

Likewise if your waiting list contained dodgy and good players I would expect to be given both (if needed) to make up the numbers if the North were short, or would you (by your comment) have kept the better players and upset your own (already selected team mate) by showing him what your thought of him by dropping him to join the north .

Hence the reason behind Davina nearly not making the team last year by not registering quick enough, which in hindsight shows how quick the teams were filled this time round........

David Marshall

I knew what I was doing when registering last year..Mr voice of the Mysterons (No.2).

It gave you Northern lot something to have a go about. Which worked as planned. The pairings worked, as planned. The outcome was, as planned.

Forget what happened before, it's history. The future is what matters.

And no matter what you wittering Mysterons threaten and filly buster and faff about. You lot are going down again this year.

SO THERE 

John Pettitt

You complwetely miss the point , Wayne.

Teams, in my era, were normally selected, especially pairings when playing the mickey mouse format of fourball better ball, You gave us complete pairings with no time at all to decide on the best pairings to suit the team throughout  and even to where they play in the batting order, so to speak.

Personally I wouild rather see this match take place over the two days with foursomes on the Sunday and singles on the Monday, Shotgun starts would be ideal on the Monday, becaiuse of the amount of matches.

I say this now because this competition is becoming more serious as the years roll by and sould be treated as such.

Wayne Santorini

Darren was given the names and added them to the list, Captains picked the pairings and more importantly the "batting order" as you so put it, but only darren knows whos playing who because captains don't pick their pairings against the opposition, they each give the list in order to Darren (blind), and I agree it should be done that way

I too agree it should be over 2 days, which is why a little experiment will be done this year with the view to putting it to vote for 2011.

I agree this is getting serious but only in the sense of the banter, I believe everyone enjoys the event for the catch up with fellow golfshakers they haven't seen since last year. I for one enjoy the overnight as much as the whole event

Wayne Santorini

David Marshall

According to your recent 'POST REPLY'  you seem to think it is...you numpty....

Wayne Santorini

David Marshall

Oh right...

My opinion of the N v S match, is to play with like minded golfshakers who enjoy the fun, banter and camaraderie that golf brings. Meet new and interesting people and to play in a friendly atmosphere.

But....

Most of all...

And best of all... 

It's to kick Northern butt 

Wayne Santorini

Darren Atkinson

Paul Williams

I personally think there should be some kind of forfeit for losing, Like some kind of walk'o'shame after the match with a big target strapped to the losing Captains arse so the winning team can all have a turn at kicking him in the butt.

Glad we had our one and only loss last year

David Marshall

And/or  let them all play off the Ladies tees too.

Most of them can't even reach them anyway

David Marshall

So what should we do with last years losing Captain?

Answer me that Paul

Plus..Paul..Your current Captain ain't  gonna want a repeat, or to be reminded, of what happened in his hotel room. 

But maybe he does  

Darren Atkinson

 I thought the shame on the Northern Teams faces was forfeit enough and I think their star first pairing left early due to fear of team reprisals  or needing to get home to do the ironing LOL

Darren Atkinson

 I thought the shame on the Northern Teams faces was forfeit enough and I think their star first pairing left early due to fear of team reprisals  or needing to get home to do the ironing LOL

Paul Williams

David,

Whatever you desire my friend!

And yes maybe he does, Whatever goes on behind closed doors is none of my business

Wayne Santorini

Listen here Darren A, don't you start with the rabbit you haven't even been on here for a while.

I don't know these southern upstarts

John Pettitt

Tim Hawkins

Darren Millichip

yes tim and probably pink ones as well coming from the southern softies!!!!

Paul Williams

David Marshall

Shows what you Northern Numpties know...

It's Harvey Nicks or nothing..Maybe Selfridges at a pinch.

Deffo not Harrods, though, too common

I can see how Waynetta may have got confused, I believe they have a department called Women at C & A 

David Marshall

John Pettitt

David Marshall

He's from all over the place, John..

Much like his golf

Dave ley

It's northerners knickers mostly bought and stamped C&A so they know which way round they go!!! 

David Marshall

I thought they didn't bother wearing them..Cause most of the time they are around their ankles anyway

Keep loading em Scarlet